Two Songs Enter, One Song Leaves

vs.




Personally, I think I'ma have to go with the Brothers Gibb, but I give Dru Hill their credit.

The Beat's Alive

Glass Candy's playing Darkroom on May 7. Yeah, Dan Deacon's also playing that day but Glass Candy > Dan Deacon all day, every day.




I was watching Glass Candy's video for Digital Versicolor the other day, and realized that Rose Byrne is the girl who stars in it. I was pretty surprised that Glass Candy had enough pull to get Rose Byrne in a music video and then I found this:



Oh.

Glass Candy - Animal Imagination

The Wedding List

Kate Bush is absolute fucking boner party.



I know it lowers my journalistic credibility when I use terms like "boner party," but I just don't know any phrasing that would more accurately describe Kate's affect on the male condition. Just look at her up there, sneering her marvelously oddball story into the microphone like that shit actually happened, two random braids in her hair, and dressed as if she could've just rolled out of bed.

She is like the unreasonably magnificent English teacher you wished for in high school, who got you to read Beowulf in the original middle english in exchange for the possiblity of a quick smile, or a slightly less quick bone while your cousin drove you guys around in her car (I'm just saying guys, that shit happens in our brave new America, except with Kate, that 14-year-old wuss wouldn't have said shit).

And good God, if you've ever wondered what kind of swag you might need to get Pete Townsend and Phil Collins to just be two dudes in your back-up band, the answer is that you need Kate Bush swag, which you simply don't got.

Oh Kate, you crazy, perfect, bonerific thing.

Be My Crush

I maybe should've posted this before Valentine's Day, but as I sorta resent the holiday, I'm glad I didn't.

The other day my friend Justin and I were waiting for the blue line, bullshitting, and Justin said something along the lines of, "Once you realize that you have power, girls become a lot easier to handle." My immediate thinking was, "Power? If we get powers, then I want to be able to stop time like the Japanese guy from Heroes."

But in the spirit of the good ol' fashion adolescent pining, here are two remixes of The Twelves' "Be My Crush": one by London's Cicada, and the other by DFA golden boy The Juan Maclean (pictured above with collaborator Nancy Whang), whose forthcoming full-length The Future Will Come I am really looking forward to.

Both remixes are radically different, and absolutely worth downloading. Cicada's mix is a more dance-friendly, slick, innuendo-filled ode to hormones, while The Juan Maclean's effort is a full, throbbing piece of deep disco with a bass line so indulgent you could probably use it to frost a cake. Shit is for serious fucked up.

Unfortunately, for all my searching I couldn't find the original version of "Be My Crush." Could these be the first remixes produced by virgin birth?


The Twelves - "Be My Crush" (Cicada's B-LIVE Rio Mix)
The Twelves - "Be My Crush" (The Juan Maclean's B- Live Rio Mix)

Name The Pet

I saw Lykke Li the other day, and according to the looks of her band, and opener Wildbirds and Peacedrums (who were incredible by the way, about as good as Lykke Li), everyone from Sweden, if not all of Scandinavia, is about as tall and perfect as the stereotype tells us.

So it's official, that's one place that I'm just never going to fucking go. I will stick with the good ol' U.S.A., land of the short and shitty, thank you very much.

Name The Pet makes solid negative distance as far as disproving the stereotype goes. From what I have gleaned from her Myspace and Youtube accounts, she is tall, magnificent, and at this point seems to also make her own beats? She also spends her spare time taking footage of her other fabulous Swedish friends playing around being fabulous.

Whatever, I don't care. America is a city on a hill and all that jazz. Just close your eyes and think about Obama. Whisper his name. Just go ahead and do it. Obama. That felt better, didn't it?

Anyway, here's a video of her dancing to her own shit like she knows the world is her oyster.



This is the shit I fucks wit'.

Sunday Night Live

I remember back in the day, when I was a little Matthew, there was this one time I was sitting in my room, playing with my Batman action figures, and my Mom walked in looking really upset. She told me to come over to her, and I climbed on to her lap, and she said this to me:

"Matthew, if you ever live-blog something, you have to blog it hard. Blog it harder than you thought you could blog. Blog it so fucking hard that you piss blood for the next week. Do not go quiet into that gentle goodnight, but blog, blog against the dying of the light."

And then she held me for some time after that, weeping. Then I too began to weep. I still don't know how, in the early 90s, my mother precepitated blogging, much less live-blogging; however, she did figure out that Snape was in love with Lily Potter about 4 pages into HPATDH (oops, spoiler alert), so I don't put it past her.


So in about 20 minutes, I am going to start blogging harder than I've ever blogged before. Click that shit, because the more traffic it gets, the more money they will pay me. Your click could be the difference between 10 or 15 dollars. I need that extra five dollars to keep me in Subway.

It's right here.

Kanye Likes Land of Talk?

Hahaha, Kanye likes Land of Talk? That's pretty cool, I think.


IMO, "Some Are Lakes" was definitely one of the bestest, saddest tracks of 2008, so I guess this just goes to show that 808s & Heartbreak is just really, uh, real.

In that case, Kanye you should just go ahead and download the whole album, it's pretty decent.

I would host the track here, but it's up at the link above, and when I use firefox I have to type in all of the html to do hyperlinks.